Merry Christmas?

So Christmas is next Wednesday,  and Dennis has yet to purchase his kids something. Oh and I fail to mention I tried to give him some money to buy them something but, he doesnt want my help. To be exact, he doesnt want me with him when he purchases the gifts... I guess, I feel like shit. This means he doesn't want me to participate in anything involving his kids. I personally feel like shit because I want to be apart of the most important yhings in his life, but his stubbornness takes up mosy of the room in his heart. How do you heal stubbornness?
Last night was surreal... not really. So dennis noticed my distance last night, and began to listen to lauryn hill... I gave him small advice, " bae, why dont you turn off the tv and lights, and play jill scott"... how did he reply, "no, I'm watching dexter and listening to lauryn hill"... I turned towards my boyfriend, "white wall" while laying in the bed and thought to myself, "yea... this relationship is one way"... but dennis surprised me, ten minutes later, he turned off the lights, played a beautiful, soulful playlist of jill scott, and I pretty much kissed his body... too bad I threw up on him.

So Dennis and travis just came back. Ebony was super pissed that travis left and said he did all sorts of fucked up shit, including telling her to have her baby daddy watch her daughter... let me mention he claims this child as if she is the holy grail, more like demon spawn. Anyway, she said he said that selfish comment, and all the while she's pumping herself up, I had to leave her room. So she leaves with her daughter and asks me to give travis their key to the door. She also left with a message for travis " I just left"... so I relayed the message... "she just left" When Travis and Dennis got back, Travis had a pink bike for ebony's daughter... Did he say "tell her daddy to watch her" ... Idk, I won't put shit passed a man... especially a little boy in a grown man's body. She's... well their relationship is very negative. Its influence is strong and very uncomfortable. When I chill with her, I began to compare dennis and travis, then it leads to this big argument between me and dennis. Atleast I was trying to say dennis was picking up travis habbits... this idiot told me that he was this way before he met travis... I looked at him with disgust. Now I understand why he takes up for Travis all the time. They are similar, alike, of the same characteristics. I see all his selfishness and wont leave... but I am selfish... wouldnt it make me more selfish to leave in the mist of him getting his life together. Take away my Toyota, and make him ride with Mata, hold my money, lay against the only thing that holds me at night, cool white walls and ... and who am I hurting? No one but myself. At the end of the day, he will possibly find another way to work, someone else to sleep with, and make his own money. I will be emotionally distraught,  while he won't remember me.  The best payback to an ex is success.